Pain In dreams too !

In my afternoon sleep after exam ..A break in mind ...The transition from Dream-World to Reality is so annoying. It brings with it a horrible sense of disillusionment and shattered hopes.

I felt that the Dream was REAL, somehow. I had a sense that thatwas the Reality. And then I woke up. To find out it wasn't true at all. To find the real Reality staring at me in the face. And in that bitter evening light, I shed a few bitter tears.

For losing the Dream that had seemed like Reality for a few minutes.....

How do we feel when we dropped down to the reality from the high peak of our imagination? Why it is that painful? Today, I am feeling the word is so unfair to me. I can’t bear it. I have lost all my patience and power to stand this pain. I am so scared to lose something and I believe the most important thing of m life. I am so scared to lose it. How come a dream can be that important to our lives? Today, my heart is crying so much and I cant show it to anybody, I cant tell anybody why it is crying and I cant tell anybody how painful it is!

I guess, I have just seen the last drop of rain of my life. I don’t think so there will be anymore rain in my life. And the last rain has washed away my last dream as well. Now, I got no dreams no hopes. I am a boat without sail and I got no direction now. I have faced this kind of thing before but this time it went so hard on me. I am feeling so heavy inside me, I am writing my entry in my blog, because I have got noting or nobody to share my pains I can share with my close friend but sometime it hurts them too. . I just share it with my laptop siting on the bed and typing my pains. What a life?

I am at the bottom line of my life I believe. Sooner or later, I will be over it and I wont have to carry it anymore. But I wont leave my pains behind, I cant do that. Will they follow me anywhere I go? could they be that hard on me?